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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26766160">Use Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BOOCHANGBINZ/pseuds/BOOCHANGBINZ'>BOOCHANGBINZ</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stray Kids (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Chan is WHIPPED whipped, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, One Shot, chanlix are the cutest soulmates, confession of feelings, felix is kinda sad but chan helps, handjobs, jisung is a very minor side character, literally just felix riding chan’s thigh and then they get soft, other members are mentioned once or twice, slight angst, thigh riding</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 03:13:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,557</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26766160</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BOOCHANGBINZ/pseuds/BOOCHANGBINZ</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“what’s that song called?”, chan asked. he sounded a bit breathless. he leaned in close, lips brushing past felix’s cheek to his ear. “use me?”</p>
<p>oh. so it was like that. </p>
<p>(lowercase intended)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bang Chan/Lee Felix</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>693</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Use Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this was supposed to be all smut but i guess chanlix makes me sentimental because it got a bit angsty.... anyway, chanlix cute asf !!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>in hindsight, felix guessed he should have known. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>it was...kinda obvious. he didn’t notice how much time had passed staring at all the lines and divots of his face until jisung was kicking him under the table. he didn’t notice that he naturally gravitated to him until they were pressed shoulder to shoulder on stage, an arm around his waist that made his skin tingle and his hands grow slick with sweat. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he was so, so stupid. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>his finger slipped against the fabric of his shirt, no, not his shirt, </span>
  <em>
    <span>his </span>
  </em>
  <span>shirt that he’d let him borrow, as he stared up at the ceiling of their shared room. his playlist was on shuffle, music playing quietly from the speakers of his phone next to his head. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>it was their first day off in a while, and felix had decided to spend it at home. jeongin was at school, hyunjin and seungmin were off </span>
  <em>
    <span>somewhere</span>
  </em>
  <span>, probably with friends. minho was visiting his parents (probably just an excuse to see his cats). changbin was in the studio, with chan. the only other person in the dorm was jisung, and felix could very clearly hear him in the shower, shouting in rapid-fire korean at the drama he was watching so that it was almost indiscernible to felix’s ears. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>usually, he wouldn’t mind being alone. especially after weeks of performances and interviews, it was kinda nice to have some alone time. the only problem was, there was doubt eating at his brain and creating a huge hole in his chest, in the place where someone would usually have a heart. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he was an idiot. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>there were rules. especially in their industry, there were </span>
  <em>
    <span>rules. </span>
  </em>
  <span>no visiting bars, or clubs, or getting involved with people who did those things. no dating fans, no swearing on camera, keep the smile and the fan service and never falter. and one rule that was so obvious it didn’t have to be said: no falling for your group members. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>the song switched and felix’s hand fell from his chest to rest by his side. use me by pvris began to play over the speakers while felix sighed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>just as soon as he’d closed his eyes, he had them forced open. the door opened loudly, in the way someone who thought he was alone would. he met chan’s eyes and saw surprise and guilt overcome his features. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“sorry”, he apologized in english. he closed the door, softer this time. “i didn’t know you were in here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“it’s okay”, felix muttered. he shifted positions, so his head was propped up on his hand. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“were you sleeping?”, chan asked. he stretched up, on his tip-toes, and threw his laptop case on the top bunk of his bed. felix bit his lip when he saw a sliver of skin reveal itself from under chan’s black tank top. he always, always wore black. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“not really”, felix replied. chan turned to him. he looked awake, alive, and felix knew he’d had a good day in the studio. he was in a good mood. as much as felix liked to see him happy, somehow it just made him more sad. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he wanted him. so badly. but he was so, so far out of his reach. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“what ya listenin’ to?”, chan asked. he flopped onto the bed next to felix, grabbing his phone to look at the song displayed on the home screen. “this is good. where’d you hear about it?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“i don’t know, i think i saw someone talking about it on tiktok or something.” chan was so close to him. their legs were touching. felix couldn’t stop staring at the place where chan’s knee was only inches away from brushing against his crotch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he shifted, so they weren’t so close. chan noticed and dropped felix’s phone. his eyes shined with mischief. “what?”, he asked innocently at the same time he moved close to felix again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>their faces were inches away. what the fuck. what the fuck. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“where’s changbin?”, felix asked, trying to change the subject. he wasn’t prepared for chan to dive his hands down and start tickling at his ribs, causing him to jump and yelp. “ah! hyung, stop!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“he’s still at the studio”, chan explained, still tickling felix and laughing when the younger tried to wiggle away but only became trapped underneath him. he laughed, eyes creasing into tiny slivers. “you’re so tense today, lix.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“nuh uh!”, felix retorted. he grabbed chan’s hands, finally pushing them away from his sensitive stomach. he looked up at chan with huge eyes, awestruck with how beautiful he looked hovering above him like that, laughing and smiling. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“yes you are”, chan replied. he sat up, and felix let go of his wrists. “it’s our first day off in weeks, you should relax.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“i </span>
  <em>
    <span>am</span>
  </em>
  <span> relaxed”, felix mumbled. he stared at chan and his disbelieving face. so he sat up, climbing across the bed and grabbing his leader in a headlock to prove his point. chan laughed and grabbed him around the waist. electricity tingled in every spot that chan touched him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“woah, big guy, calm down.” like it was the easiest thing on earth, chan escaped his choke hold and shifted so he was holding onto either side of felix’s waist and pulled him down. felix’s everything was engulfed in chan, so he was all that he could see and hear and feel. he was aware that they were wrestling, laughing and teasing and fighting for dominance as the bed creaked under their combined weight. it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>normal</span>
  </em>
  <span>; they had done it so many times, all the members had wrestled like this, they were all boys after all, but felix felt so hot. he felt nervous when he kicked his leg up and kneed chan in the stomach, felt embarrassed when chan picked him up like he weighed nothing and threw him back down, felt a burning everywhere when he saw chan’s laughing, sweaty face. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>somehow, he was pulled onto chan’s lap. his crotch grazed against his thigh and, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, it felt so good. he was 100% thinking with his dick and nothing else when he let a little moan out, just loud enough for chan to hear. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>. he froze, eyes wide and cheeks burning with embarrassment. chan was staring at him, his hands frozen on felix’s tiny body. “i—uhm—i’m sorry, i—“</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>felix shifted off of chan, clearing his throat and silently cursing himself. seriously? how stupid was he? did he seriously do that, right in front of chan? and, fuck, he had a </span>
  <em>
    <span>boner</span>
  </em>
  <span>, what the hell was wrong with him?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“uh, felix”, chan started. he was staring </span>
  <em>
    <span>right at</span>
  </em>
  <span> felix’s crotch, at the stupid bulge that wouldn’t go away. he wanted nothing more than to fall right through the floor and into the depths of hell where, hopefully, he’d never have to see chan again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he was never going to recover from this. he was just going to have to die from embarrassment. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“hey, it’s okay.” chan’s reassurance did nothing to cure his crippling embarrassment. he felt a hand on his shoulder, rubbing comforting circles into his skin, but he shrugged it off. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“i’m just gonna—“, felix started and began to stand up, until a hand grabbed his wrist and pulled him back down. right into chan’s lap. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“sorry”, chan laughed. he had an arm around felix’s waist, holding him there. there was no escape, he would just have to face it. “i didn’t mean to pull you so hard.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>felix didn’t say anything. what could he say? he just looked away, swallowing nervously and praying chan couldn’t see the red clearly painting his cheeks. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“it’s really okay”, chan assured him. his heart leaped when he felt chan’s hands shifting him, until he was straddling his thigh. and, fuck, his dick was back to being pressed into muscular skin, begging for friction. he wanted to cry when he felt it twitch and knew that chan could feel it too. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he finally met chan’s eyes when the older brushed his hair away from his forehead. he offered a comforting smile, one that did little for felix’s current situation. but he could tell that chan meant his words and he wasn’t mad, or disgusted. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“it’s okay if you…”, chan trailed off. felix could tell that he was nervous himself. there was red dusting his cheeks, too. “uhm”, chan started with a short laugh and a clearing of his throat. his hands slid down to rest on the small of felix’s back. he bounced his leg a bit and felix had to bite back another moan. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“what’s that song called?”, chan asked. he sounded a bit breathless. he leaned in close, lips brushing past felix’s cheek to his ear. “use me?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p><ol>

<em><span>oh</span></em><span>. so it was like that. </span>

</ol>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>felix’s hands were resting on chan’s chest. if he splayed his hand out, he could feel his heart beating rapidly. instead, he fisted his shirt and moved his hips forward slowly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p><ol>

<em><span>oh</span></em><span>. oh, </span><em><span>fuck</span></em><span>. </span>

</ol>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“ah”, he let a soft sound slip out. there was sweat beading on his forehead, half from pleasure and half from nervousness. chan’s hands moved further down his body, resting on his hips and helping to pull him forward. “ah, fuck.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>the friction felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>so good</span>
  </em>
  <span>. like, better than when he dry-humped his pillow. better than when he jerked himself off in the shower. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he found himself moving faster. panting and letting soft moans slip past his lips, rutting against chan’s thigh like a dog in heat. and chan guided him through all of it, hands on his body and whispers in his ear. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he couldn’t make out most of it. his head was so clouded with pleasure. but he could hear small phrases, “so good”, “beautiful”, “it’s okay, keep going”, “baby”, “pretty moans”. all of it went straight to his dick, and he whimpered a bit when he felt a knot forming in the base of his cock. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“ah, channie hyung”, he moaned, grinding deep into his thigh and panting against his shoulder. “ah, fuck, fuck, fuck.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“it’s okay”, chan reassured him. he had such kind and genuine eyes. felix rutted down and stayed still for a bit, savoring the pleasure and friction. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he moaned, loud, when he felt chan pressing kisses and small bites into the sensitive part of his neck. he wrapped his hands around chan’s neck, holding on tight as he sped up and his thrusts became disjointed. “fuck, chan, m’gonna—“</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he was panting heavily and sweat dripped down his face. he was so</span>
  <em>
    <span>, so</span>
  </em>
  <span> close and swear to god, he knew it was gonna be the best orgasm he’d ever had. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“you’re doing great”, chan whispered in his ear. his hands were at the front now, slipping down his pants and underwear and touching his dick with no material in between. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>”, felix moaned, bucking his hips into chan’s hand and fucking himself in his fingers. “oh, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>and he was cumming into chan’s hand with a loud gasp, like he’d never cum before. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>for several seconds, they just sat there. chan’s hand still in his pants, felix gasping for breath, sweat slicked foreheads sliding against each other. then, chan took his hand out and moved his face forward, pressing a gentle kiss to felix’s lips. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“you okay?”, he asked. he was still so close, his eyes were still closed. felix thought he looked so beautiful. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“yeah.” his voice was deep, rough, breathless. chan’s eyes flickered open, eyelashes brushing against felix’s cheeks from how close they were. “thanks.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“my pleasure”, chan whispered before pressing another quick kiss on his lips. when he pulled back, he laughed softly. “we should get you cleaned up. i think jisung is still using the shower though.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>____</span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>so what did it mean?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>felix was letting his mind wander again. his hand gripped his shirt, </span>
  <em>
    <span>chan’s </span>
  </em>
  <span>shirt, right where his heart would be. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>after chan had wiped him clean, in a way that was so gentle and caring that it made felix blush, they had made dinner, invited jisung to eat with them, and then felix had disappeared back into his room while their leader and jisung played several extremely loud rounds of mario kart on the switch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan had acted like nothing happened. probably because jisung was there. or probably because it meant nothing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>felix gripped his shirt harder, then let it fall. the feeling of chan’s lips were burned into his own. the feeling of his hands on his body were still fresh. he was selfish, he really was, because he wanted </span>
  <em>
    <span>more</span>
  </em>
  <span>. he wanted to do it again, and then try other things, and even more than that, he wanted to hold hands with chan. go on a date with him. talk and laugh over a candle-lit dinner. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he knew he couldn’t have any of that. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>the door to their room opened. he assumed it was changbin, finally home from the studio and grabbing some clothes to get changed. the lights were off and felix was tucked under his blankets, facing away from the door, so he figured changbin would assume he was asleep and leave the room without a word spoken. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he was surprised when the mattress dipped and someone climbed into bed next to him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>strong arms wrapped around his body, hands splayed out on his chest, and the hair on the back of his neck stood up when he felt hot breath there. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“hey.” the familiar voice of his leader, the comforting tone of his australian accent that never failed to remind felix of home. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“hi.” he was kinda glad that chan couldn’t see his face. he felt almost on the edge of tears, like a pathetic little boy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“you okay?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>it wasn’t the first time chan had asked him that. the first was branded into his brain. hollow breaths, just off of his post-orgasm high. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“mhm.” chan snuggled in closer, burying his face in felix’s back. it felt nice, really nice. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>maybe he was selfish. maybe chan was, too. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“chan?”, he asked. his voice felt broken. chan shifted behind him, and felix felt a chin digging into his shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“yeah?” breath on his ear, the distinct smell of mint toothpaste. his stomach did a little leap. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“i’m scared”, he admitted. just as soon as the words left his lips, he felt chan’s arms tighten around him. like an anchor keeping him on earth, chan was his rock. chan was </span>
  <em>
    <span>home</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“don’t be, love”, chan whispered. there was a soft kiss on the shell of his ear and he giggled. chan laughed too, tracing lines into felix’s stomach with his fingers. “to be honest, i really like you. i </span>
  <em>
    <span>have</span>
  </em>
  <span> liked you, for a while.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“really?”, felix asked. he could feel chan nod, his chin hitting his shoulder repeatedly. “i...i've felt that way too.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“we should go out sometime”, chan suggested jokingly. “get to know each other. ‘cause, you know, i don’t like to go past first base until i’ve been on a couple dates.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“oh yeah?”, felix replied, going along with his joke. he turned around, so they were facing each other. he took a couple seconds to just stare in chan’s eyes, and let all his fears melt away. “i would like that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>chan leaned in to kiss him, and felix felt like he could cup the world in his hands. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>they are boyfriends. no i do not take constructive criticism.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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